10. Simply ask yourself “is there anything this girl can’t do?”
The answer is a resounding “no.”
9.Very recently I discovered the bible, the bible being Vogue magazine
8.Not surprisingly, three out of my top five photos that have been “favourited” by Flickr folks are of my body and a bikini.
7.I love being girlie, I love using the phrase “just being a girl” as an excuse for countless offenses and I love that everything “girlie” is just a little bit more fabulous.6.In recent weeks, I’ve given much thought about what it means to be a girl. Sometimes it’s much more difficult than men realize. What their logical brains can’t figure out is how we girls can be so illogical at times.
5.I think that’s me - the girl who is too good of a catch for many men to deal with.
4.The truth is, I have long legs and a narrow waist, and mass jean manufacturers simply don’t cut their jeans to suit. Even Gap’s ‘Long and Lean’ collection presumes that “if you’re tall then surely you must have saddlebags, so let’s put in extra fabric to accommodate for them.” The truth is, I’m 5-foot-9 with a 3/4 waist.
3It’s somewhat intriguing that I live in a high-rise apartment building in downtown Vancouver. Each day I put on sparkly jewellery and high heels beforing clicking my way down the sidewalk to yet another high rise. There, I sit in a swivelling chair while my manicured nails clack away on a keyboard for eight hours.
2.Usually I get the compliments of the following sort:
“Keira, your hair is gorgeous.”
or…
“Keira, I wish I smelled as pretty as you do.”
or…
“Keira, how come you’re so good at everything you do?”
or…
“Keira…oh, Keira…mmm…yeah…”
And coming in at number one, my personal favourite...a tip for blow jobs. Surprising? Just the fact that Keira can stop talking about how shiny her hair is for long enough to suck a...well...anyway....
1.One tip I can offer you: Breathe through your nose. Breathing through your mouth is, quite literally, impossible when obstructed. That logic didn’t come to me instantly.
11 comments:
You seem to be a very sad, bitter, and lonely person.
I hope life gets better for you.
Thanks so much for your well wishes Tod. It means a lot to me. I'm so sad and lonely.
Lonely people use sarcasm.
I'm not gonna insult you, because I believe we're all entitled to our opinions- I've got a lot (many of which aren't very popular), so I can't really place any judgement.
I just don't understand.
Why wouldn't you just click past Keira's blog if it bothered you so much? You claim to have so little patience for her, yet you create a blog to slander her AND you obviously took great pains to read through all her posts to create a top 10 list.
I'm just saying that if something brings out the ugly in you, why on earth would you spend so much time obsessing over it?
Truth be told, you didn't make your day or Keira's brighter.
So what gives Stanley?
Ok Chels...ever watched a movie that was so bad it was good? That's like Keira's blog. It's like a car crash I can't look away from. If you'll notice I didn't do a lot of slander in this blog post; I'm primarily quoting so if blondie stands by her words then there shouldn't be a lot of offense. If you read them though, even as a friend you have to see the shallow self absorption in her blog. No? Just me? I'm not "so bothered" by it, more amused. Thanks for not insulting me.
Switchboard...what makes you awesome I'm being sarcastic. If lonely people use sarcasm then I am lonely and if I'm lonely why would I not say I was lonely? My girlfriend is friends with Keira. My girlfriend is hot. She's just not as wrapped up in herself. I don't know why this bothers everyone so much and no one thinks it's funny. I think it's hilarious. Even Keira admitted it's well written. Chill out people. I'm not angry. I thought Keira would be flattered by my collection of her quotes. I guess I was wrong...
What I love so much about blogs and the "blogworld" is the different values, opinions and ideas that are shared and floated around between fellow bloggers. I've been fortunate enough to meet a lot of great people through this medium; people I am honoured to call my friends.
In sharing opinions and views, debate and disagreement are two guarantees. That, however, is what makes it most interesting.
Stanley, the truth is I'm neither flattered nor offended. What bothers me is that, instead of being open and honest with who you really are, you have seemingly chosen to hide behind a pseudonym, unwilling to own up to your opinion. You could have simply chosen to send me an e-mail in this regard and perhaps a fruitful conversation could have taken place; one that would have been conducive to positive communication. Instead, you decided to air dirty laundry in a public forum. The reason for which you did so, I have no idea.
Everyone's opinion is valid, but unless one is willing to pony up, that opinion can't be taken seriously by anyone.
And while I understand that my blog is not everyone's cup of tea, it is my own. And while my sense of humour isn't something everyone understands, much of what I write is done so with tongue firmly planted in cheek. Beyond that, I have no need or desire to justify myself to you or anyone else, for that matter.
I did so because it is funny to me.
Honestly, she's trying to live a 'model' princessy life in vancouver. The only thing is- too bad she doesn't really have the looks to match it. LOOOL.
She's one of those chicks, and I quote, she goes on saying something about how 'she's girlie' and 'has beautiful hair'. As I was saying, she's honestly one of those girls, that from the back, any guy from a distance, would be 'wow, not bad at all'... then when she turns around.. it's like 'woof, ouch!'.
I can't stand, anally retentive individuals like her. She lives in a bubble, and has a dog that's obviously way cuter than she is. Probably the only reason why she got it in the first place.
I don't know how in the world she finds love? Maybe she gets it at the night market who knows. Anyways, she is the perfect example for the coined saying 'butterface','cellulite-mama', and 'mosquito bite tits'. hmmm can't I get a hoorah!
Well... it's a shame, if she were nicer as a person. I would have been more than courteous with her. But she's been a major hemorroid. and I'm yes, venting.
Honestly, I know alot alot of pretty folk. Models actors, you name it. And I've never met a girl like Keira who has such a snobby attitude and a stink in life to constantly hate and rain on things. If it's not her way, then she complains, coz she's perfect. The only reason she blogs, is because, no MAN, good looking or of class would even ask her out, on their own, without her starting the conversation!! She seeks attention digitally b/c she can't get it in real life.
I may have been diagnosed with cancer, and coping with it positively. But Keira is truly the real cancer. I prolly got it, from all her negativity. You know how Karma works. I don't mind, that's life! shitty things happen to good people. And with my efforts to abide by her ways of life, she still can't be happy!
Like c'mon, I tried finding her a bf, even offered to pay for the entire night out for them. I'm a popular guy amongst the chique crowd in Vancouver's nightlife. And out of all the bachelors that I've asked to go out with her, so it shuts her perfectness princessy self up. NONE OF THEM WANTED TO, unless i offered them money.
Now that's messed. and she's just bitter. WTV, I live at my coal harbor condo, or at my girlfriends place, but the times I run into this 'shim', well omg, ever vomit in your mouth? but hold it in. Well ya, I always get fooled when I see her, coz, from behind, she's relatively okay, but when she turns around face-wise, I'm always in regret.
LIKE WHY!! do us a favor, go get laid and stop being such a anal retentive she-man! And the only reason she always says that she's ''girlie'' alot. -IS BECAUSE, SHE WAS BORN WITH BOTH GENETALIA. just like Lady Gaga. But Shhhh, that's a secret ok?
Honestly, she's trying to live a 'model' princessy life in vancouver. The only thing is- too bad she doesn't really have the looks to match it. LOOOL.
She's one of those chicks, and I quote, she goes on saying something about how 'she's girlie' and 'has beautiful hair'. As I was saying, she's honestly one of those girls, that from the back, any guy from a distance, would be 'wow, not bad at all'... then when she turns around.. it's like 'woof, ouch!'.
I can't stand, anally retentive individuals like her. She lives in a bubble, and has a dog that's obviously way cuter than she is. Probably the only reason why she got it in the first place.
I don't know how in the world she finds love? Maybe she gets it at the night market who knows. Anyways, she is the perfect example for the coined saying 'butterface','cellulite-mama', and 'mosquito bite tits'. hmmm can't I get a hoorah!
Well... it's a shame, if she were nicer as a person. I would have been more than courteous with her. But she's been a major hemorroid. and I'm yes, venting.
Honestly, I know alot alot of pretty folk. Models actors, you name it. And I've never met a girl like Keira who has such a snobby attitude and a stink in life to constantly hate and rain on things. If it's not her way, then she complains, coz she's perfect. The only reason she blogs, is because, no MAN, good looking or of class would even ask her out, on their own, without her starting the conversation!! She seeks attention digitally b/c she can't get it in real life.
I may have been diagnosed with cancer, and coping with it positively. But Keira is truly the real cancer. I prolly got it, from all her negativity. You know how Karma works. I don't mind, that's life! shitty things happen to good people. And with my efforts to abide by her ways of life, she still can't be happy!
Like c'mon, I tried finding her a bf, even offered to pay for the entire night out for them. I'm a popular guy amongst the chique crowd in Vancouver's nightlife. And out of all the bachelors that I've asked to go out with her, so it shuts her perfectness princessy self up. NONE OF THEM WANTED TO, unless i offered them money.
Now that's messed. and she's just bitter. WTV, I live at my coal harbor condo, or at my girlfriends place, but the times I run into this 'shim', well omg, ever vomit in your mouth? but hold it in. Well ya, I always get fooled when I see her, coz, from behind, she's relatively okay, but when she turns around face-wise, I'm always in regret.
LIKE WHY!! do us a favor, go get laid and stop being such a anal retentive she-man! And the only reason she always says that she's ''girlie'' alot. -IS BECAUSE, SHE WAS BORN WITH BOTH GENETALIA. just like Lady Gaga. But Shhhh, that's a secret ok?
And for the record,
Carrie Bradshaw, pfft, her face looks like a younger version of TERRY BRADSHAW! who knew?
and Stanley, why would she state that you stalk her. She's not even a 3/10. pfft, more like a little vomit seeped from the side of my mouth again.
Can I get a hoorah?!
PS:
Stanley, you're gold! simply decadent genius. Keep up the blogs, I'll make sure to ask all my friends to support your blog, so u get as many clicks!!!! : )
Check it out,
I'm not one to lie. Check out her fugtastic mug, imagine her without make-up (it's not like it actually helps her out, LOOOOOOL!!!!!)
Like whoaly, no wonder, she focusses so much on her hair. who knew?
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/b/b2/Terry_Bradshaw.jpg/495px-Terry_Bradshaw.jpg
Anyways, here's a pic of TERRY BRADSHAW, let's do the similarities of this travesty of a transvestite of a SHIM woman Keira.
Dim the lights, cause I think I'm in love with her?! lmafo.
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